Child like excitement

Do you remember when you were a little one and just got so excited about things?  Not just Christmas but random things.  Knowing a movie you wanted to watch was coming out, a new bike. then next book in a series that you loved.   Anything that made the warm fuzzy feeling of excitement.   

Our Little Miss Horsey girl has loved horses I think her whole life.  She has been put on a horse almost from the beginning. When she was 4, she started horse riding lessons.  She fell off 2 years ago, I think, and broke her wrist.  Her mom hasn't been in a rush to make that happen again.  Also, LMHG (Little Miss Horsey Girl) doesn't want to ride English.  She wants to ride Western. (a girl after her Grandma Greats heart).  She and I had a sleep over a few weeks ago.  We were talking about the farm.  She told me she really wanted to go ride.  I told her when I went next time, I'd let her know.  I was and I did.  Her folks said she could go.  When I picked her up, she was vibrating!  She had told her mom next time she didn't want to know until the day of.  It had been too long to wait! Tuesday to Thursday.  LOL She had packed Tuesday.  This is what she packed for 3 days, 6 pairs of undies, 3 pairs of pants, 2 pj's, 2 socks, 4 shirts, 3 shorts, 1 jumpsuit, 1 hoodie, 1 coat, 3 pairs of boots, 1 pair of slides, 3 books, 1 tablet and a few stuffed toys.   Her parents LAUGHED at this.  

When I woke up Friday morning, at 7 AM I rolled over and the 2 little eyes said Nana when are we getting ready?  I said LMHG I just opened my eyes.  You have got to give me a minute.  In a little voice she said OK.  I said go find Papa and ask him for breakfast.  I got in the shower then dressed.  I went to make some tea and everywhere I walked she was on my heels.  She asked when are we leaving?  I said Uncle Bugs isn't quite ready yet.  We will leave at 9.  

 She sat there waiting for about 30 minutes. 

At 9:35 she asked how many more hours?  I said please don't ask that again.  We haven't even gone 1 hour yet.  At 10:40, Are we almost there yet?  I said we aren't even halfway yet.  I'll let you know when we are half way.  We will get to the farm at 3.   While we were driving, she asked what time would she be able to ride?  I just sighed. 

I absolutely love her excitement and love for horses.  Every time she saw horses out her window she yelled HORSES!  She is just So in love with them!  

We stopped for lunch and got back on the road.  I made her came to the front and look at the clock when we got to the farm.  It was 2:58!  

She did not ride that first day, but we got apples and carrots and she fed the 2 horses and the donkey all they wanted. 

We got up Saturday morning and had breakfast and then got our hineys outside!  I helped her catch and brush and then she helped me get the saddle and tack ready.  Raven hadn't been ridden in 3 years.  She did OK.  We don't remember dad riding her with a bit, so her mouth never stopped moving but she did really well with a tiny rider.  Then Bugs and I both took a turn.  We needed a bigger saddle but for what we did it was just fine. Then dream off all dreams she got to ride bareback!  Saturday AND Sunday!  She did good and is so brave!  I'm so very proud of her!  On Sunday we did some farm chores and she got to ride on the trailer and help me drive the mower. 

She was not thrilled to leave the farm but knew Dad and mom would miss her.  She also would miss her.  So home we went.  

Her Uncle Tom set her up with a lead line reign and she was so excited!  No bridle, nothing but a halter and lead line. 

It was a very good weekend.  One little girl was over the moon!

Find something that makes you excited!  Remember something that you used to be excited about, do that!

Peace

When the reason comes out

Several years ago I had a life changing experience.  I had a grand mal seizure at work.  Through testing and more tests I have been diagnosed with Epilepsy.  I continued to have different types of seizures until they got my meds right.  I have been seizure free for over 3 years.  So... today, 

Breezy and I went on a hike.  It was cool but not raining.  We had an almost 10-mile hike on our calendar.  We met at the assigned time, headed to the trail head.  It was a wonderful hike.  There are several small water crossings and 2 what I would call tricky/wet feet crossings.  We did really good right up until the last one.  Wet feet for both of us.  We laughed but went on.  We hiked to the most beautiful falls.  Oh, it's beautiful there.  We had lunch and took pictures and enjoyed our time there.   While we were there several groups of people came to enjoy it.  It's a non-raining Sunday, trails are busy.  We started early though.  One of the groups left as we were getting geared back up.  Hiked back out of the base of the falls and headed back down the trail.  As we came to the first crossing the group of 3 young people that had left in front of us were across the water but in the boulders.  It was obvious she was in trouble.  Her head was lolling to the side, and she was very floppy.  I grabbed Breezy's trekking poles, and she went off.  She was in SARS years ago and a guide.  She works in the medical field, with patients, now.  She was the most qualified between the 2 of us.  She got there first and safely.  When I got there, she was doing vitals as best as she could and asking questions.  Maddie apparently had said she felt funny and then promptly had a seizure in the rocks.  She appeared to have not hit her head and nothing was broken but she was not in a good way.  At all.  When we realized nothing was broken we needed to get her out of the boulders.  We got her up and off the trail under the trees.  She was not coherent and very floppy.  Breezy asked all the smart questions and We were figuring out all the what nows.  There was a couple that crossed with us.  The asked if we wanted 911.  I looked at Breezy, we looked at Maddie, and said yes.  There was a sign heading up to the trailhead that said no cell service and no 911.  Somewhere about mid hike I suddenly got a text, so I explained to keep checking as I had random service on the way up.  about 20 minutes later a man who had been booking it rounded the corner out of breath.  He asked if we needed 911, they had a Garmin in reach.  Breezy said yes.  The other couple had passed them and they said they were headed to find 911. The new folks had the Garmin so the man came running up! Lots of texts with SAR and conversations with us, we came to the conclusion that we would carry Maddie and start down.  We were about 3 hours of a wait if we stayed so we thought we could cut some of the distance if we all helped. We started down, lots of stops and lots of water.  We ran into the SARS folks and they asked lots of info and took vitals and talked a lot to Maddie and her friends.  They asked Breezy and I what we saw/did.  They took over.  Breezy and I both exhaled and went whew!  

So here is where I came in.  I'm really good in an emergency.  I fall apart later.  I don't know how Maddie felt, but I know how I felt waking up after a seizure. I was scared and very disoriented for about 24 + hours. When Maddie started coming around and was so confused, I could talk to her, from experience.  I held her hand and told her she was ok and would continue to be ok.  I told her I have epilepsy and my experiences.  She asked several questions that I could answer.  I told her what she might expect in the ambulance.  She wanted them to give her something in the ambulance to make sure that didn't happen again.  We chuckled and said that isn't how it works.  But they would help her to figure out what happened. I told her friends that when they called her parents they needed to start with, she's ok, but this has happened.  I hugged her when we left.  I'm confident she will be just fine. 

So after all that, I had my first answer to the "why did this have to happen to me?"  My diagnoses has brought a fear into my life I didn't know I could have.  I've worked through a lot and am way better.  There are still things I'd rather not do alone, just in case. But beside all that, I helped a young 24 year old women with what was probably the scariest moments in her life.  I had some answers for her.  

The moral of the story?  Breezy and I will now have a Garmin in reach for just said emergency! 

Peace

Isn't life funny

 Not in the funny ha ha kind of way.  

Life changes in an instant doesn't it.  My mom fell and broke her hip.  She's had to have a partial hip replacement.  What a gnarly surgery!  Her surgeon explained all the particulars to us.  I'm not fascinated about medical stuff, but I wanted to know what he had done to my mother.  I was listening and understanding what he did.  My brother sat there with his fingers in his ears.  NO JOKE.  51 years old.  My older brother blanched white.  Ding dong boys.  She is on her way to going home.   Mom hasn't loved rehab, but she's done the work. We aren't sure how things will be different but going home she is!  

We had a grandbaby who was coming to join our family.  It wasn't meant to be.  That has been hard on all of us.  We are so very sad.  They are hurting with the loss.  It's a painful thing, missing/grieving for someone you didn't know you wanted.  We all had instant dreams and wishes for this little one. As a family we were so excited.  Now we are just sad.  

My sister in law's dad is fighting cancer.  They live across the country from each other.  It's scary and hard to deal with.  My heart hurts for her.  Prayer is all we can offer and some days it just doesn't seem enough. When things go sideways with my mom/brothers, I'm just across the state from them.  I can't imagine living across the country. I hate cancer.  

I just keep thinking, we are all just one heartbeat away....  feels weird.  

Remember if someone matters to you, tell them!  Leave nothing unsaid.  You really just don't know. 

Peace

It's you and me kid

 

In a six-month period we will be adding 4 people to our family.  WHOOIE!  

Last June Heir came to us and told us that he was really in love with his longtime friend/travel buddy.  They have been on so many adventures.  They would meet all over the world for vacations. She has been here with us, and he's been there with her family.  We knew she was important to him.  BUT when he was 18 years old, he came to us and said he had no desire for children and or a wife.  We told him there are worse things than not having children.  Thats having them if you don't want them.  We really are fine with it.  I then told him that if and when he met "her" he would move a mountain to be with her.  BUT seriously no worry from us if he never did.  Well, he did!  So, he went off and got himself a Mrs. Heir!  We are so happy for him.  Boy oh boy has he had to take some ribbing from his brothers who he has teased endlessly about getting married and having children.  If he and Mrs. Heir decide to become parents, it's going to start all over again.  AND it's well deserved.  In brotherly love. 

T2 has meet his happy ever after! They will be getting married this summer.  Miss fiancé' has 2 little girls, so not only a new DIL but 2 new grands.  So that will be 6 girls to 2 boys.  We are so happy for T2.  He has waited a long time to find her.  She will be a wonderful addition to our family.  They are both so excited and wedding plans are in full swing!  I'm again reminded that I love being a boy mom.  lol 

I remember being pregnant with each of my boys.  I remember loving the feeling of it being just them and me.  I didn't have to share them with anyone.  They were all mine.  I could feel them move inside me.  I was never alone, and neither were they.  The first sound they heard was my heartbeat. There is just something so magical in being pregnant.  We only told the news we were pregnant early one time.  Oh that was the longest pregnancy ever!  We learned not to do that again.  I loved the time that it really was just them and me.  A secret I carried under my heart.  I also remember when they were born.  I wasn't that person who was SO IN LOVE that first second.  I was tired and bloody and in pain.  It was in the quiet of the night and everyone was gone, it was just them and me again.  That feeling of Oh, there you are!  I've been waiting to see your face.  THAT was the moment I was so overwhelmed with love and all the emotions that come with it.  

Now that they are all adults and finding their own partners, or not, and moving forward in their lives I'm trying to remember those times and not get overwhelmed with them going out on their own.  Yes I know they have been doing this for 20+ years.  As Monkey is our last but still lives at home while he is in school, we aren't truly empty nesters.  When we started our family and then when we decided we were complete, The thought of growing our family in a new way wasn't even on my radar.  I like this part!  Family is an endless chain, there is always room for one more name. 

Peace

Make it a good one!

 I read a sign that said, "tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365-page book.  Write a good one. 

For whatever reason that struck me.  We all have a story to tell.  We have good stories, not so good stories and just some plain old ugly stories.  I guess this is my blank page.  My mom journals every day.  I've tried.  Most of the time I could just write, see yesterday.  I started this a long time ago and have kept at it regularly at times and then HUGE gaps of time.   Sometimes I have a lot to say, some, not so much.  I have things started but am not sure how to make it say what I want.  So it's just saved.  Maybe it will come to me, maybe it will be deleted.  Eh, we'll see.  I've thought about writing a book.  The thought of having enough to say, who would read it, why?  So, this is as close as I will get.  I guess today the goal was to tell you this,

Tomorrow is the first blank page of your 365-page book.  Write a good one.

Peace

Everyone can learn

 Bugs has loved all things critters since forever.  When he was little if you were reading to him and he picked the book, it was always about bugs, critters, all things gross.  In my opinion. I don't mind all those things, as long as they are outside.  Where they belong.  By the time he was 5 he knew more about bugs then I know now.  He was and is so very smart.  

Bugs had the same teacher for kindergarten and 1st grade.  He loved her and she loved him.  He was very ambidextrous. He used which ever hand was closest when you handed him something. In the first grade we told him we didn't care which, but he had to pick a hand.  He was equally bad at writing with either hand. I'm not sure that has ever improved. They don't even teach cursive anymore.  Thats a whole other rant.  In first grade there were 2 little girls who LOVED Bugs.  They kept kissing him on the bus.  I finally had to go to his teacher and ask her to make it stop.  I know, as the mother of boys, that if the roles were reversed, he would have been in trouble.  As it was, the girls were not allowed to sit with him on the bus.  I think he still holds this against me.  He had things he struggled with but mostly hit the goals. Except with reading.  Mrs. White said he'd catch up.  I believed her. 

When Drummer was in 2nd grade, he had a teacher who did not care for eclectic learners.  Drummer could not sit flat on his bum.  He always had one foot under his butt in the desk chair.  She would send notes home that Drummer wouldn't sit in his chair.  More than one time I asked her, is he disruptive?  Is he bothering anyone?  No and No.  So what's the problem again?  Well, he won't sit all the way down.  I guess I'll talk to him.  This went on all year.  He's also a lefty so he turned his paper, she didn't like that either.  Heir had had her first.  He was a shy, follow the rules kind of kid.  So Drummer was a huge difference.  Sooo back to Bugs. He was assigned the same teacher for his 2nd grade.  The first thing out of her mouth on meet the teacher day, was, OH I had your brother.  OH boy.  I thought, why not hello, nice to meet you. I had your brother, I'm excited to have you too.  NOTHING of the sort.   In hindsight I should have pulled him out of her class right then. I didn't.  I have felt bad ever since and will listen to myself next time.  And have. She had NOT ONE WORD of anything nice or positive to say about Bugs all year long.  Every parent teacher conference was nothing but negative. Every report card, NOTHING nice.  That whole year was a complete waste of time.  I really am not sure he learned anything that year. 

Third grade was just a year, Bugs couldn't read much.  But was told over and over that he'd catch up.  Math was a struggle and reading was a joke.  He didn't seem to hate school the way he had the year before, so we all thought that we were over the worst of it.  When he got to 4th grade, we were called in right away.  She seemed to think we weren't aware that our kid couldn't read.  We said yes, we know!  He just keeps getting shoved on through, being told that he'll catch up. He hadn't.  She looked us and Bugs in the eyes and said by the end of this year this boy is going to learn to read.  I believed her.  She offered hope.  By the end of 4th grade he was reading.  He picked his own books out that interested him.  He read Where the red fern grows.  He was devastated by the way.  He dropped the book on the floor sobbing into my arms that the dog died.  Spoiler alert!  I tried to get him to understand that he read the whole book!  He got to read the story and draw his own pictures in his mind. My timing was really off. By the time he was finishing the 5th grade he was reading at grade level and an avid reader was made!  He read My side of the mountain. All three of those and so many adventure books. He realized he could go anywhere in a book.  By middle school he was reading at a high school level.   He even got in trouble for not doing homework, so he got grounded from books.  He got his homework finished.  He still is an avid reader.  I think he has every book he's ever been given.  

School was never easy for Bugs.  He learned to read but math is his nemesis.  We moved just before his freshman year.  New city, no friends.  It was a very hard time for him.  He really shut down and every year he fell farther behind.  We were always looking for ways to help him.  Tutors and all the things.  It just wasn't working.  In the middle of his junior year he came home and dropped a paper on my desk and said My counselor thinks this might be good for me.  I looked at him and the paper and read it and thought, yes, this won't happen.  Fast forward to March and he said Mom that open house is coming up and I want to go.  OK!  So we went over to Bremerton to the WYA.  Washington Youth Acadamy. Now called WYCA Washington Youth Challenge Acadamy.  It's an opportunity to make up, up to 8 credits to get you to graduation.  It's a 6-month residential military school.   The very first requirement is that the kid must want to go there.  They have to interview and be accepted.  He did all the work.  He left in July and was there until just before Christmas.  He did so very good there.  He thrived with the strict schedules and expectations. They learn to work as a team.  That all your decisions effect everyone around you.  Bugs got the credits he needed to graduate.  He went back to school in January and graduated in August.  That one last dreaded math credit! But he got it done!  He graduated the year he was supposed to. We could not have been prouder.  The program has 2 parts, residential and then post. That part is also 6 months, I think.  He graduated from that too.  We were/are still so proud of him.  We thought he might pursue a career in the military.  He decided not to.  He works, has a good job and lives in his own place with roommates.  Almost no one can afford to live on their own here.  He is a wonderful active member of society. 

All this to say I would like to go back to the second-grade teacher and pull him out of her class.  Fast forward to when Monkey was in second grade, he got assigned that teacher.  We went to the principal's office and I said if he has to be in her class I'm pulling him out of this school.  Today.  Needless to say he did not have her for his teacher.  I think she retired the next year.  She needed to. Anyway, back to Bugs, I should have pulled him out of her class.  I think it set a president for the rest of his education.  He hated school.  BUT, this kid learned. Math is not his favorite, it doesn't come easy to him.  He loves biology/science type classes.  He LOVES to read.  He knows he can go anywhere he wants in a book, in his mind.  

Everyone can learn.  

This was the hardest thing he had ever done.  7 months later he finished what he said he would.  He graduated from Highschool.  On time.  Oh how I love this boy.  

Just because you/yours has a different learning style doesn't mean anything other than it's a different learning style.  Everyone can learn. 

He did it!

Be kind to each other. 

Peace

Merry Christmas!

Yes, I know it's February.  But well, you know.  Life.

So Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and all the things. 

December was a busy month as it usually is for most people.  Breezy and I went to a hockey game.  We lost.  AND No real fights. I wanted the gloves and fists to go flying! I was really disappointed.  Isn't that why you watch hockey? 

We really did have a good time.  In March we are going to a rugby match.  That was her condition of going to a hockey game. I'm sure we will have just as much fun then. 

Since Air Apparent was 18 years old he has said he didn't want to get married or have children. We were absolutely fine with that.  There are worst things then not having children, that's having them if you don't want them.  When Princess was born, I watched him fall in love in seconds.  However, he has never wavered on the kid's thing. Well.... big news!  Heir got married!  He is so very happy.  We are so happy for him.  She is a welcome member of our family.  

Mom came for Christmas.  We always have fun together.  We did a day trip on the light rail.  Mom had never done it.  We rode it end to end.  There is a mall on our end.  Nothing at the other.  LOL  But we waved at Heir as we went by his work.  

We had a lovely Christmas day/dinner.  It was a little different for several reasons.  I have a feeling next year will be VERY different.  No matter what the day, as long as we are all together, it will be good. I took ZERO pictures of Christmas day. That strikes me as really odd, but here we are.  NONE

We went and saw the Christmas lights at the casino.  They do a million-dollar light show.  VERY beautiful.  

We decided to take the light rail to the airport to send Mom back home.  It had a few moments of stress but overall, a great way to do that.  No fuss no muss.  We are all experts now. 

It's always hard to send mom home.  But there is always someone to miss.  Until next time. 

I hope wherever you are, whoever you spent it with, I hope your holidays were wonderful.  I hope you have a great 2024!  We are hoping, praying for good things. 

Peace