Monday, April 22, 2024

Isn't life funny

 Not in the funny ha ha kind of way.  

Life changes in an instant doesn't it.  My mom fell and broke her hip.  She's had to have a partial hip replacement.  What a gnarly surgery!  Her surgeon explained all the particulars to us.  I'm not fascinated about medical stuff, but I wanted to know what he had done to my mother.  I was listening and understanding what he did.  My brother sat there with his fingers in his ears.  NO JOKE.  51 years old.  My older brother blanched white.  Ding dong boys.  She is on her way to going home.   Mom hasn't loved rehab, but she's done the work. We aren't sure how things will be different but going home she is!  

We had a grandbaby who was coming to join our family.  It wasn't meant to be.  That has been hard on all of us.  We are so very sad.  They are hurting with the loss.  It's a painful thing, missing/grieving for someone you didn't know you wanted.  We all had instant dreams and wishes for this little one. As a family we were so excited.  Now we are just sad.  

My sister in law's dad is fighting cancer.  They live across the country from each other.  It's scary and hard to deal with.  My heart hurts for her.  Prayer is all we can offer and some days it just doesn't seem enough. When things go sideways with my mom/brothers, I'm just across the state from them.  I can't imagine living across the country. I hate cancer.  

I just keep thinking, we are all just one heartbeat away....  feels weird.  

Remember if someone matters to you, tell them!  Leave nothing unsaid.  You really just don't know. 

Peace


Saturday, March 9, 2024

It's you and me kid

 

In a six-month period we will be adding 4 people to our family.  WHOOIE!  

Last June Heir came to us and told us that he was really in love with his longtime friend/travel buddy.  They have been on so many adventures.  They would meet all over the world for vacations. She has been here with us, and he's been there with her family.  We knew she was important to him.  BUT when he was 18 years old, he came to us and said he had no desire for children and or a wife.  We told him there are worse things than not having children.  Thats having them if you don't want them.  We really are fine with it.  I then told him that if and when he met "her" he would move a mountain to be with her.  BUT seriously no worry from us if he never did.  Well, he did!  So, he went off and got himself a Mrs. Heir!  We are so happy for him.  Boy oh boy has he had to take some ribbing from his brothers who he has teased endlessly about getting married and having children.  If he and Mrs. Heir decide to become parents, it's going to start all over again.  AND it's well deserved.  In brotherly love. 

T2 has meet his happy ever after! They will be getting married this summer.  Miss fiancĂ©' has 2 little girls, so not only a new DIL but 2 new grands.  So that will be 6 girls to 2 boys.  We are so happy for T2.  He has waited a long time to find her.  She will be a wonderful addition to our family.  They are both so excited and wedding plans are in full swing!  I'm again reminded that I love being a boy mom.  lol 

I remember being pregnant with each of my boys.  I remember loving the feeling of it being just them and me.  I didn't have to share them with anyone.  They were all mine.  I could feel them move inside me.  I was never alone, and neither were they.  The first sound they heard was my heartbeat. There is just something so magical in being pregnant.  We only told the news we were pregnant early one time.  Oh that was the longest pregnancy ever!  We learned not to do that again.  I loved the time that it really was just them and me.  A secret I carried under my heart.  I also remember when they were born.  I wasn't that person who was SO IN LOVE that first second.  I was tired and bloody and in pain.  It was in the quiet of the night and everyone was gone, it was just them and me again.  That feeling of Oh, there you are!  I've been waiting to see your face.  THAT was the moment I was so overwhelmed with love and all the emotions that come with it.  

Now that they are all adults and finding their own partners, or not, and moving forward in their lives I'm trying to remember those times and not get overwhelmed with them going out on their own.  Yes I know they have been doing this for 20+ years.  As Monkey is our last but still lives at home while he is in school, we aren't truly empty nesters.  When we started our family and then when we decided we were complete, The thought of growing our family in a new way wasn't even on my radar.  I like this part!  Family is an endless chain, there is always room for one more name. 



Peace

Wednesday, February 28, 2024

Make it a good one!

 I read a sign that said, "tomorrow is the first blank page of a 365-page book.  Write a good one. 

For whatever reason that struck me.  We all have a story to tell.  We have good stories, not so good stories and just some plain old ugly stories.  I guess this is my blank page.  My mom journals every day.  I've tried.  Most of the time I could just write, see yesterday.  I started this a long time ago and have kept at it regularly at times and then HUGE gaps of time.   Sometimes I have a lot to say, some, not so much.  I have things started but am not sure how to make it say what I want.  So it's just saved.  Maybe it will come to me, maybe it will be deleted.  Eh, we'll see.  I've thought about writing a book.  The thought of having enough to say, who would read it, why?  So, this is as close as I will get.  I guess today the goal was to tell you this,

Tomorrow is the first blank page of your 365-page book.  Write a good one.

Peace

Tuesday, February 27, 2024

Everyone can learn

 Bugs has loved all things critters since forever.  When he was little if you were reading to him and he picked the book, it was always about bugs, critters, all things gross.  In my opinion. I don't mind all those things, as long as they are outside.  Where they belong.  By the time he was 5 he knew more about bugs then I know now.  He was and is so very smart.  

Bugs had the same teacher for kindergarten and 1st grade.  He loved her and she loved him.  He was very ambidextrous. He used which ever hand was closest when you handed him something. In the first grade we told him we didn't care which, but he had to pick a hand.  He was equally bad at writing with either hand. I'm not sure that has ever improved. They don't even teach cursive anymore.  Thats a whole other rant.  In first grade there were 2 little girls who LOVED Bugs.  They kept kissing him on the bus.  I finally had to go to his teacher and ask her to make it stop.  I know, as the mother of boys, that if the roles were reversed, he would have been in trouble.  As it was, the girls were not allowed to sit with him on the bus.  I think he still holds this against me.  He had things he struggled with but mostly hit the goals. Except with reading.  Mrs. White said he'd catch up.  I believed her. 

When Drummer was in 2nd grade, he had a teacher who did not care for eclectic learners.  Drummer could not sit flat on his bum.  He always had one foot under his butt in the desk chair.  She would send notes home that Drummer wouldn't sit in his chair.  More than one time I asked her, is he disruptive?  Is he bothering anyone?  No and No.  So what's the problem again?  Well, he won't sit all the way down.  I guess I'll talk to him.  This went on all year.  He's also a lefty so he turned his paper, she didn't like that either.  Heir had had her first.  He was a shy, follow the rules kind of kid.  So Drummer was a huge difference.  Sooo back to Bugs. He was assigned the same teacher for his 2nd grade.  The first thing out of her mouth on meet the teacher day, was, OH I had your brother.  OH boy.  I thought, why not hello, nice to meet you. I had your brother, I'm excited to have you too.  NOTHING of the sort.   In hindsight I should have pulled him out of her class right then. I didn't.  I have felt bad ever since and will listen to myself next time.  And have. She had NOT ONE WORD of anything nice or positive to say about Bugs all year long.  Every parent teacher conference was nothing but negative. Every report card, NOTHING nice.  That whole year was a complete waste of time.  I really am not sure he learned anything that year. 

Third grade was just a year, Bugs couldn't read much.  But was told over and over that he'd catch up.  Math was a struggle and reading was a joke.  He didn't seem to hate school the way he had the year before, so we all thought that we were over the worst of it.  When he got to 4th grade, we were called in right away.  She seemed to think we weren't aware that our kid couldn't read.  We said yes, we know!  He just keeps getting shoved on through, being told that he'll catch up. He hadn't.  She looked us and Bugs in the eyes and said by the end of this year this boy is going to learn to read.  I believed her.  She offered hope.  By the end of 4th grade he was reading.  He picked his own books out that interested him.  He read Where the red fern grows.  He was devastated by the way.  He dropped the book on the floor sobbing into my arms that the dog died.  Spoiler alert!  I tried to get him to understand that he read the whole book!  He got to read the story and draw his own pictures in his mind. My timing was really off. By the time he was finishing the 5th grade he was reading at grade level and an avid reader was made!  He read My side of the mountain. All three of those and so many adventure books. He realized he could go anywhere in a book.  By middle school he was reading at a high school level.   He even got in trouble for not doing homework, so he got grounded from books.  He got his homework finished.  He still is an avid reader.  I think he has every book he's ever been given.  

School was never easy for Bugs.  He learned to read but math is his nemesis.  We moved just before his freshman year.  New city, no friends.  It was a very hard time for him.  He really shut down and every year he fell farther behind.  We were always looking for ways to help him.  Tutors and all the things.  It just wasn't working.  In the middle of his junior year he came home and dropped a paper on my desk and said My counselor thinks this might be good for me.  I looked at him and the paper and read it and thought, yes, this won't happen.  Fast forward to March and he said Mom that open house is coming up and I want to go.  OK!  So we went over to Bremerton to the WYA.  Washington Youth Acadamy. Now called WYCA Washington Youth Challenge Acadamy.  It's an opportunity to make up, up to 8 credits to get you to graduation.  It's a 6-month residential military school.   The very first requirement is that the kid must want to go there.  They have to interview and be accepted.  He did all the work.  He left in July and was there until just before Christmas.  He did so very good there.  He thrived with the strict schedules and expectations. They learn to work as a team.  That all your decisions effect everyone around you.  Bugs got the credits he needed to graduate.  He went back to school in January and graduated in August.  That one last dreaded math credit! But he got it done!  He graduated the year he was supposed to. We could not have been prouder.  The program has 2 parts, residential and then post. That part is also 6 months, I think.  He graduated from that too.  We were/are still so proud of him.  We thought he might pursue a career in the military.  He decided not to.  He works, has a good job and lives in his own place with roommates.  Almost no one can afford to live on their own here.  He is a wonderful active member of society. 

All this to say I would like to go back to the second-grade teacher and pull him out of her class.  Fast forward to when Monkey was in second grade, he got assigned that teacher.  We went to the principal's office and I said if he has to be in her class I'm pulling him out of this school.  Today.  Needless to say he did not have her for his teacher.  I think she retired the next year.  She needed to. Anyway, back to Bugs, I should have pulled him out of her class.  I think it set a president for the rest of his education.  He hated school.  BUT, this kid learned. Math is not his favorite, it doesn't come easy to him.  He loves biology/science type classes.  He LOVES to read.  He knows he can go anywhere he wants in a book, in his mind.  

Everyone can learn.  




This was the hardest thing he had ever done.  7 months later he finished what he said he would.  He graduated from Highschool.  On time.  Oh how I love this boy.  

Just because you/yours has a different learning style doesn't mean anything other than it's a different learning style.  Everyone can learn. 


He did it!


Be kind to each other. 

Peace

Monday, February 5, 2024

Merry Christmas!

Yes, I know it's February.  But well, you know.  Life.

So Merry Christmas, Happy New Year and all the things. 

December was a busy month as it usually is for most people.  Breezy and I went to a hockey game.  We lost.  AND No real fights. I wanted the gloves and fists to go flying! I was really disappointed.  Isn't that why you watch hockey? 






We really did have a good time.  In March we are going to a rugby match.  That was her condition of going to a hockey game. I'm sure we will have just as much fun then. 

Since Air Apparent was 18 years old he has said he didn't want to get married or have children. We were absolutely fine with that.  There are worst things then not having children, that's having them if you don't want them.  When Princess was born, I watched him fall in love in seconds.  However, he has never wavered on the kid's thing. Well.... big news!  Heir got married!  He is so very happy.  We are so happy for him.  She is a welcome member of our family.  

Mom came for Christmas.  We always have fun together.  We did a day trip on the light rail.  Mom had never done it.  We rode it end to end.  There is a mall on our end.  Nothing at the other.  LOL  But we waved at Heir as we went by his work.  

We had a lovely Christmas day/dinner.  It was a little different for several reasons.  I have a feeling next year will be VERY different.  No matter what the day, as long as we are all together, it will be good. I took ZERO pictures of Christmas day. That strikes me as really odd, but here we are.  NONE

We went and saw the Christmas lights at the casino.  They do a million-dollar light show.  VERY beautiful.  










We decided to take the light rail to the airport to send Mom back home.  It had a few moments of stress but overall, a great way to do that.  No fuss no muss.  We are all experts now. 




It's always hard to send mom home.  But there is always someone to miss.  Until next time. 

I hope wherever you are, whoever you spent it with, I hope your holidays were wonderful.  I hope you have a great 2024!  We are hoping, praying for good things. 

Peace


Sunday, January 21, 2024

Out of order


In October SIL now known as Breezy, and I were talking. She had never been to Winthrop.  It is a beautiful little town.  It really is in the middle of nowhere in the mountains.  It is a hub for all kinds of outdoor activities. All year long. From where I live, the prettiest highway closes in the winter.  So I told Breezy we had to go soon or wait until early Summer because not long after the first snow they gate the highway.  We could go around but it's not as pretty and takes HOURS longer. So plans were made and we were off. 

I have taken another friend there in the past and she seemed a bit disappointed.  I think if you've never been it may sound like a touristy town like Leavenworth. It isn't.  It's just a really old mining town in the middle of nowhere in the mountains.   I tried to make sure Breezy understood and was game.  All that to say I was a little nervous.  It was a beautiful day!  The drive was wonderful.  Of course, lots of talking.  




One of the reason's I love it there is they have the BEST ice cream.  Breezy is an ice cream fanatic same as me.  She was all in! The place only had commercially made flavors.  I want to say 6 different kinds. NONE of their homemade kinds.  Because it was almost Winter.  We were both SO bummed. I had really played up the ice cream.  So we shopped in all the little shops and had a wonderful lunch. It really was a good time.  

 

There is a museum there that is all about mining.  It was very interesting. I had never taken the time to go up and look at it all.  It was really cool.   







I thought I had taken some mining equipment pictures but I guess not.  
Since Breezy works very early in the morning we opted to go back home the way we came instead of down the river and making a big circle.  





I was still disappointed in the no ice cream situation.  So I stopped in Mt. Vernon at the Big Scoop. It's an old-time soda fountain type place. That really is old.
 I had the ice cream I craved and Breezy got her favorite kind.  We had a great day that ended on a great note!

I was trying to think of something profound or clever to end this with.  Nothing is coming to me right yet.  So... take care of each other. Be kind. 
Peace





 


Wednesday, January 17, 2024

Salty Sea Air for the Win



My sister-in-law asked me if I were interested in going to a king tide.  Salty sea air?  Of course!  I had never been to Westport before.  We always go to Ocean shores, probably out of habit more than anything else.  And it's close.  Westport isn't any farther, just a left turn when we'd normally go right. It was a king tide with huge waves predicted.  I got to Breezy's house about 9 and off we went.  The traffic was not bad at all.  High tide was at 1:00. We had plenty of time.  Oh, I forgot to say it was freezing flippen cold!  Literally!  We both had layered up.  Warm coats, leggings under our jeans, so on and so forth.   Breezy had on a beany. THAT would have been a good idea for me.  I really don't like hats though. So my head/ears were very cold.  




We started out in the lookout tower.  It really is beautiful there.  
These next pictures are where the fun really started.  We climbed on the breaker wall.  We saw the rocks were wet, but we didn't process that info well.  So... the last picture is as the waves washed over us on the breaker.  





After our soaking we went to the car to wipe up. LOL We were both worried about our camera's.  We wiped off and kept at it until the visible water was gone. We are both pretty sure salt water isn't good for cameras.   I had a dry coat to put on. Breezy did not.  She was standing and I was kneeling on the rocks so she got the worst of it.  Her whole legs were wet.  Not fun!  But we muscled through.  There were still pictures to take!  We both were a little disappointed in the waves. She was led to believe they were going to be 10 feet plus waves.  They were not.  BUT there is not a bad day at the ocean.  






As we headed up and back down the beach, we saw a dead seal.  I'll spare you the pictures.  She hadn't been there terribly long and had no sign of why she died.  It was sad.  Even if it is the nature of life.  We drove around for a bit.  We were going to go out over the jetty to the ocean side but neither of us felt too much like hiking after the soaking we had.  We were cold.   


We of course, had to have fish and chips.  It was wonderful! We sat under a heater, so it was really special.  LOL  
After lunch we had to go find the seals we'd been hearing.  I have a video of them talking but I couldn't get it to load. So just imagine it. 







No whales, but we didn't go to the ocean side.  So, a pretty sunset in our mirror as we drove home made for a wonderful day! 


Happy New Year
Peace